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18 Jul 2021

RIGHT KEEP TRAFFIC SLOWER

Left keep people rushing. Gating on tail, no. Sign by is explained everything.

17 Jul 2021

FIVE

It’s a sign. A message from the universe. What is it telling us? What does it mean. Is it about the little piggies (they have such a complicated relations what with the marketing, roast beef and wee- wee-weeeing). Maybe it a message to play the lottery, the one that only uses only 10 bouncing ping pong balls. Or is it satanic? Like pentagrams, upside down stars and forks with five prongs. I need to find a soothsayer.

16 Jul 2021

MARKOUT TO HELL

If you are going to do an excavation you need to call for a markout. That’s so you don’t get electrocuted by underground power lines, blown up by hitting a gas main or lynched for cutting off the internet when you slice through fiber optic or cable lines. In Philadelphia they have conduits to hell. The conduits are for demons, allowing them to commute and get around the city efficiently. Satan has a pretty good engineering department. If you damaged […]

15 Jul 2021

GORILLA MEMORIAL

It’s Mighty Joe, the gorilla. He used to be called George when he was at a go-kart track in Wildwood. He was not well cared for, his feet having buckled under him in a storm. Not a very dignified existence.  Larry Valenzano, a gas station owner used to pass by him and George reminded him of his late son who was a body builder and was known as Mighty Joe. So Larry bought George fixed him up, transported him across […]

14 Jul 2021

DON’T TIP COWS

They don’t need the money. I’ve never tipped a cow or even tried. It’s mean. Imagine snoozing on your feet and suddenly having someone push you over. Crash, smashed head, maybe a broken rib. Fortunately, I don’t sleep standing up and neither do cows. They lay down and take short naps. They are always aware of their surroundings, even when snoozing, so it’s hard to sneak up on them. They weigh over 1000 pounds and are well balanced on their […]

13 Jul 2021

ORGANIC INSECT CONTROL

Maybe organic isn’t the right word. Maybe physical control or insect smashing would be a better description. I like the idea that nasty chemicals aren’t involved but I can imagine this might result in some extra cleaning if you have carpeting. Plus it must be a lot of work for controlling ants. Also, what about flying insects. Do these guys know how to do flying stomps? Flying, spinning back-stomps? Termites and ants fly sometimes. Does stomping include kicking? What about […]

12 Jul 2021

ANIMATED CONVERSATION

I don’t see a cell phone, an earbud or a second person across the table but it looks like our dining friend is having a great conversation. Why not? No interruptions this way. Most of the time when chatting we are often waiting for the other person to pause so we can command the dialog for a little while. With an invisible companion, you can steer the conversation however you like.

11 Jul 2021

BODY FUNCTION FEEDBACK

It’s nice to know that people care about how we are feeling. Generally, I find my restroom experiences to be positive. There is a calling, an urge, a desire for internal to external transition (or is that transmission?) and a restroom provides the perfect vehicle. A tree works well too for some transmissions. I don’t recall anyone ever asking me about my restroom experiences, except my doctor. I guess inquiring minds want to know. I wonder how they will use […]

10 Jul 2021

3D WORLD

What happens when you put on 3D glasses in a 3D world? Is it doubled? Do you see a 6D world? Or is it geometric progression and you see a 9D? It can be jaw dropping. No driving or operating submarines with the glasses until you are comfortable with extended dimensions.

09 Jul 2021

LAWN PARADE

A plastic procession. A cabal of color. A throng of things carefully lined up for our viewing but only for the adventurous who journey to the land of lost toys. Our hero (name withheld because I forgot to ask) seeks and finds the lonely, discarded extruded polymers that once filled Toys-R-Us but which have been outgrown and forgotten. He is drawn to markets and yard sales where he discovers the treasures that he brings back to his enclave hidden deep […]